


Fine Lines

by frozenCinders



Category: Kamen Rider OOO
Genre: Gen, uva shows up just to receive candy and be confused about it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-13
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-21 10:53:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30020670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frozenCinders/pseuds/frozenCinders
Summary: The best part about only being half-revived is definitely the new body Kazari picked up. It's weirdly soft and blunt everywhere, but he supposes it's important to look harmless for their purposes. Not to even mention the other benefits it affords, like heightened senses.
Kudos: 3





	Fine Lines

**Author's Note:**

> not only am i 99% sure that this particular flavor of gum isn't a thing in japan, but it's no longer even a thing in america either since like a million years ago. luckily it's fiction and i make the rules 💗
> 
> and because i make the rules i'm also retconning the fact that the greeeds other than ankh are just using illusion magic or whatever to appear human. they all get human hosts in my little mindbrain

If Ankh can do research on modern humans, so can Kazari, and he does have a bit of a competitive streak, so of course he'll be going deeper than Ankh. He does a lot of research on human perception, on what people will subconsciously deem as threatening or harmless. Most things associated with children are deemed as harmless, except when you cross a thin line and suddenly turn threatening with the same subject matter. Kazari watches three horror movies in a row about this phenomenon, much more interested in the human psychology of it all than the actual performance on the flashing screen.

Kazari likes the idea of being able to easily turn endearing behavior into a threat on a dime, so he makes himself very familiar with such tactics. Maybe modeling himself after a hodgepodge of horror movie antagonists is not the way he should be trying to blend in, but what's the point of doing anything that isn't either fun or hilarious?

He learns to keep this newfound interest to himself when the rest of the Greeeds show no understanding whatsoever. Uva in particular is convinced Kazari just likes to watch the characters succumb to fear and inevitable death, and Kazari honestly doesn't care to correct him. He also doesn't quite understand the concept of actors yet, and was surprised to learn that humans will record themselves killing each other. Kazari outright refuses to correct him on that one.

Another thing he picked up is that "sweetness" is associated with innocence. Then again, he finds another fine line wherein something called a "punk" is also sometimes associated with "candy", which is "sweet". He does like walking those lines, so Kazari takes some cash from Uva's host's wallet, since he's the only one with an abundance for whatever reason, and heads to a convenience store. He picks out several different candies, the new, bright colors drawing him in, and trades the money for them. It's an easy transaction that takes no discussing or haggling or double-crossing. Kazari supposes he sees the value of such a custom.

He finds that he doesn't understand most of what is written on the packages, the backs covered in lines of words he doesn't begin to recognize. He got several yellow and orange candies, and then ended up with a few with blue and green packaging as well. The green is strange, as the colorful packaging does not match the candy on the inside. The first packet he opens contains a little brown rectangle. When he bites into it, it tastes dull yet somehow a little fascinating, and it leaves a cold sensation on his tongue. It's not his thing, though, so he quickly abandons the bag.

The candies are all so varied. Kazari can vaguely tell what "sweet" is, but there are so many variations on it that he can't actually set a standard. One of the candies is labeled as being sour, but although there's something about it that stings and screams, it still sort of registers as sweet to Kazari.

What turns out to be his favorite happens to be the one he saved for last. It's the candy associated with "punks": gum. The standard flavor is something that's pink, but the kind that caught Kazari's eye is bright yellow with a deep red center, labeled as cherry lemonade. When he'd looked up what gum was supposed to be, he learned that you aren't meant to swallow it, and that it'll persevere without shrinking until the flavor runs out.

The second he bites into it, he knows he has to get more. It's sweet and sour, he thinks, so bright and bold in his mouth. Being able to taste is a blessing that humans don't talk about nearly enough. With flavors like this in the world, Kazari is almost annoyed that he felt no need to steal a human host 800 years ago.

While idly chewing the gum, Kazari looks up some more information. What is "mint", what is "chocolate", what is the difference between sour and sweet? He also found a hilariously inaccurate personality test that tries to determine who you are based on your flavor preference. He doesn't even recognize what half of the questions are about, but it tries to tell him at the end about how he's a kind person or whatever.

This human information network is pretty fun.

Because the bag is green, Kazari goes and drops the mint chocolates onto Uva-- specifically directly into his lap while he's sitting down.

"Huh?" He picks the bag up, inadvertently spilling a few of the little wrappers and scrambling to get them back inside. "What is all this?"

"Try eating it," Kazari says.

"Why?"

He's suspicious, narrowing his human's eyes at Kazari. It's funny to see, but Kazari supposes his own amused little smile is with a human mouth now, too.

"Well, you can tell a lot about a person by what flavors they prefer," Kazari lies, just because he still thinks it's funny.

"What..?"

Uva looks the bag over, no doubt about to give in because of the color. Kazari starts counting down in his head, and Uva is unwrapping one of the chocolates before he even hits zero. He chews cautiously like he thinks it might be packed with razor blades.

"Is it good?" Kazari asks, pulling up an assessment of people who enjoy bittersweet candy.

"It's... yeah, why?" Uva answers, still highly suspicious.

With a barely restrained smirk, Kazari reads out: "Relaxed and honest, you're the voice of reason in your friend group. Leadership comes naturally to you, but you tend to seethe quietly when it's time to listen to somebody else for a change... huh, how about that?"

"Friend group?" Uva repeats, utterly confused. "Are you reading that from somewhere?"

Uva stands and tries to grab the phone from Kazari, who pulls it out of his reach.

"And what are you eating, anyway? I haven't seen you put anything in your mouth."

Kazari takes the pack of gum out of his pocket and shakes it in front of Uva before hiding it away again.

"Humans make a lot of fun things out of boredom, it seems," Kazari says. "Why not indulge?"

Uva doesn't seem outwardly convinced, but he keeps the bag of chocolates, at last believing that it isn't poisoned.

At least Gamel agrees with Kazari that sweets are fun. And Ankh, for whatever that's worth.


End file.
